Beneath the Current Page 9

Shawn nodded. That made more sense, he just didn't know why Martin Jorss would lie about it, or why Casey would feel worried about telling him about it. It seemed like a weird secret to hide.

  Casey picked up a small handful of sand, and almost unconsciously began sifting it through his fingers in a nervous gesture. Shawn remained silent, hoping that Casey might reveal more. He did.

  "Uncle Martin and Uncle Thomas took me in when my parents died. But being a gay couple, they couldn't officially adopt me," he relayed the story that he'd been told as to why his last name was different from theirs. "So we basically have hidden out here, keeping to ourselves so no one bothers us."

  Shawn was nodding understandingly. That made a little more sense. It still seemed a little extreme, but still, he could see how family could become super protective. Hell, his own had rallied around him to protect him from the media fallout of his alter ego's exposé.

  ****

  Casey couldn't believe he'd just revealed part of their secret to a virtual stranger. His uncles had always ingrained in him the need to keep himself hidden. Not only because of the obvious part, but because neither Martin nor Thomas had legal custody of him—because they were gay, or so they'd told him. So he'd given Shawn part of the truth. Maybe it would be enough to keep him from asking too much more.

  "Don't you get lonely?" Shawn asked, but then he quickly realized how that might sound. "I mean, with no one to talk to but your uncle?"

  "Sometimes, but—" he cut himself off as he'd been about to admit he found comfort in some of his ocean friends. "I find things to do," he finished softly.

  "I know I'd get lonely if I was out here for years without anyone else around," Shawn mused.

  "What about your wife?"

  "Wife?" Shawn frowned.

  Casey quickly amended. "Your girlfriend?"

  "Wife? Girlfriend? I don't have—" Shawn started laughing. "Oh, shit, your uncle didn't tell you, did he?"

  Casey's brows furrowed. "Tell me what?"

  "That I'm gay," Shawn chuckled.

  Casey's jaw hung open in shock, as he tried to comprehend what he'd seen of the lithe little woman and what Shawn was saying. "But— but I saw—"

  "Who? Jenny?" Shawn supplied through his fit of giggles. "She's just a friend of the family. My dad's assistant actually. She just helped arrange getting the cottage ready and made sure everything was fine."

  "Oh," Casey managed to respond. Guess that's why he hadn't seen her around. Oh. He straightened as he suddenly realized that Shawn wasn't just the good looking guy next door. He was available, in the sense that Casey hadn't even thought possible. His breath hitched as he regarded Shawn's expressions more closely. Could the guy maybe, actually, be interested in him? Oh, shit, what if he was like Roshan?

  Shawn looked at him closely as well. "Does that bother you? I assumed you wouldn't have a problem with it, having lived with two uncles who were the same. I actually thought you knew. That he'd told you."

  "Oh, I don't... have any problems, of course. He just didn't—...well, he didn't tell me anything about your first visit."

  "Really?" Shawn seemed surprised. "He certainly was vocal about me not coming back to visit. Thought maybe he'd told you all sorts of horrible things to make you run the other way if you ever saw me."

  Casey chuckled. "Well, he did warn me to stay away from you."

  "Maybe he thought I'd steal you away from here," Shawn smirked.

  Casey's mouth dropped open at the implication that Shawn actually might be interested in him that way. Casey cast his eyes away to the ocean, regret clouding his vision as he realized it would never be possible. "Yeah, that would never happen," he muttered.

  He heard Shawn shift slightly and looked back to see the slightly hurt expression on the man's face. "I'm sorry. I was just kidding. I didn't me to assume that you might also—"

  "No!" Casey almost shouted as he realized what he'd said must have sounded like he would never be interested in Shawn, then looked away in embarrassment as he buried his face in his hands. As he slowly looked back up into the eyes of the man next to him, his fingers slid down to the silver collar. "It's not that I wouldn't want to... I do find you..." he cut himself off, floundering for the words. "What I mean is that, my uncle would never let me leave. He's...he's just really protective. He doesn't want anyone around me."

  "But you're like eighteen, nineteen, right? He can't make you stay if you don't want to."

  "I'm twenty, actually," he smiled. "And well, I guess... well, I don't know really." Casey chewed on his lip again. He'd never considered ever leaving this place. As much as he might long to explore farther, he knew he was safe here. It was his protected little world. "I don't know how I would feel about leaving..."

  Shawn stared at him as if trying to figure out the truth in his words. "I'm not suggesting we run off and get married or anything," Shawn joked. "Just wondering if... you might like to hang out a bit?"

  Casey chuckled. "I think I'd like that. I just...well, I think it's best if, you know, my uncle doesn't know. He doesn't really trust anyone."

  "Yeah, I kinda got that. He's that protective, huh?"

  Casey rolled his eyes, beginning to relax more and more in the casual, easy-going presence of his neighbor. "You have no idea."

  "Hey, how about we go swimming? Cool off a bit," Shawn said abruptly, slapping his hand down on Casey's thigh, and Casey thought the heat from the man's hand was going to make his blood start to boil.

  Shawn didn't wait for an answer, and Casey was glad because blood was heading south really fast as Shawn's hand slipped a bit further up his leg as he jumped to his feet. Casey watched Shawn reach back behind his head and pull the white tank over his head effortlessly, displaying all those fine muscles for him.

  Shit, Casey gulped as Shawn turned and tossed his shirt on the sand, took his goggles from where he had them wrapped around his wrist, and darted for the water. Those tanned broad shoulders looked even better up close, and the way they bunched and rippled as he jogged across the sand...Casey finally caught his breath long enough to realize he'd been staring so long that Shawn was already hip deep in the waves. It took Casey another minute to gather himself together enough to pull off his over-size tee and follow.

  At least, in the water, he could hide his obvious interest in the man.

  ****

  Shawn didn't wait for Casey to follow him as he raced off for the crashing surf. The cute hesitation and uncertainty in the younger man's voice had him aching to gather the guy up and soothe away all that worry. But obviously that would just scare the shit out of him even more than his forward questioning already had. It was time to back off.

  Shawn didn't want Casey to feel like he was being forced to do anything. If he followed, great, if not, then so be it. Casey was obviously nervous being around him, and Shawn didn't want to scare him off. He'd seen Casey starting to relax, and Casey could have left at any time, so hopefully Shawn hadn't pushed the guy too hard.

  But damn, he wanted to know everything about this guy. For whatever reason he couldn't yet figure out, the younger man intrigued him like very few people did. Maybe it was his isolation or his innate shyness. Shawn had rarely associated with people like that, so often seeking like-minded company ready to hang out and have a good time that Casey's quiet nature shook his foundation.

  In high school, Shawn was the typical guy that everyone seemed to know and like. He played at most sports, but he wasn't so good to really stand out. He'd been the funny guy, always ready to go out and have fun. Girls and guys alike had flocked to him. Even in college, he'd been the one everyone wanted to hang around, ask for help with class work, call to join in impromptu basketball or soccer games. It hadn't mattered to anyone then that he might be gay.

  But Casey was like the shy, quiet guy Shawn often didn't notice hovering in the background, which made him wonder just how many nice guys he may have overlooked in his quest to be the cool guy.

  As he turned briefly with the waves sp
lashing up around his thighs, he noticed that Casey hadn't moved. He was just staring at him. Damn, maybe I really did scare him with too many questions. But then Casey rose, yanking off the ridiculously huge shirt he was wearing to reveal those lean abs that Shawn had seen a couple days ago when he'd managed to introduce himself.

  He noted that Casey looked nervously over his shoulder back to his house, and he realized just how anxious about being caught by his uncle Casey was. He wondered just why Casey would be so nervous about that, and the thoughts that came to mind didn't settle well at all.

  But then Casey's lean body was running toward him and all thoughts of the older man fled his mind. If it made Casey feel better to keep their friendship secret, he'd do everything he could to keep it that way. He watched as Casey grinned at him before diving into the shallow surf.

  Shawn smiled as dove into the salty turquoise waters and stroked out past the breakers to where Casey was treading water waiting on him to catch up. Shawn laughed as Casey splashed him almost hesitantly, like he wanted to relax and play around, but wasn't sure if it was okay. When Shawn splashed back, Casey's nerves seemed to melt even more.

  As they raced each other up and down the shoreline, Shawn was surprised that Casey wasn't more graceful considering how long he'd lived here. But damn could he hold his breath. While Shawn was coming up for air constantly, Casey seemed to stay under several minutes.

  Shawn reveled in the few inadvertent brushes of skin when they'd bumped into each other when the waves would jostle them close to each other. An arm brushing against a hip. A calf sliding against a shin. A hand against a hip.

  Yeah, Shawn sighed when they finally parted and he watched Casey's retreating form making its way up the slope, I think things are definitely looking up.

  Chapter 12

  "I'm heading out now," Martin called down the hallway.

  "Okay," Casey called back, keeping his voice calm and even, even though he was practically vibrating with the need for the man to just leave. The last three days after Martin had left he'd practically darted down to the beach, where either Shawn was already waiting or arrived within minutes of Casey's arrival.

  Actually, Casey couldn't say that they did much of anything really. Lying on the beach, swimming, and talking a bit was about what the couple hours each afternoon boiled down too. Shawn had carried most of their conversations as Casey was often still too nervous to start one. But with Shawn's easy going attitude and relaxed nature, Casey found that he could relax too. Shawn was easy to talk to, joking and cajoling softly to ease Casey's anxieties, and Casey found himself enjoying the deep cadence of Shawn's voice as he shared quite a few raunchy tales from his college days.

  Honestly, he probably knew more about Shawn than Shawn knew of him, but then there wasn't a lot to tell—well, that he could tell anyway. Mostly, Shawn had kept the topics of conversation simple—favorite movies, TV shows, music, etc—but Casey suspected Shawn knew that he was still anxious around him, as well as trying to hide their little 'dates' from his uncle.

  He knew that Shawn was a writer, but he'd been vague about what he wrote about. He was an American, and his father was a senator in the U.S., and he was surprised that Casey really didn't know much about politics at all. But then Casey's world came down to just this small island and nothing much mattered beyond it.

  Casey grabbed his towel and headed down the path, only to see Shawn heading toward him as well. They both pulled out the lounge chairs from their secure spot in the rocks and dropped their towels on it.

  Casey stripped off his shirt almost immediately, not unaware of Shawn's glance cast his way. While Shawn had made no overt indication that he was interested in anything other than friendship, even Casey could see the desire in the man's eyes. Hell, Casey was pretty sure he was giving off the same looks.

  He dropped his shirt on the chair as Shawn pat him on the back.

  "So, anything exciting happen since yesterday?" he asked playfully as he did each day.

  "Nah, just watched a movie," Casey shrugged, enjoying the lingering of Shawn's fingers as they grazed over his back.

  "Really? What movie?" Shawn asked while he removed his own shirt as they proceeded through their daily routine of shedding shirts, heading to swim, then laying out in the sun before Casey disappeared back into the abyss of his uncle's house.

  "Um, Splash," Casey answered, surprised when Shawn stopped abruptly and stared at him. "What?"

  "Jeez that movie is like thirty years old. Don't you have anything more recent?" Shawn quipped as he started back toward the surf.

  "Uncle Martin doesn't get that many movies. Most of them are older."

  "Well, what about watching online?"

  Casey shrugged. "I've tried a few times, but the internet connection isn't so great, and there's a lot of buffering. I've given up on that."

  "Oh, yeah, I've noticed that it's not that good," Shawn agreed as they splashed into the water and Shawn fitted the goggles over his eyes. They ducked under, getting their whole bodies wet, before surfacing again. "I still can't believe the salt water doesn't bother your eyes."

  Casey just laughed. Shawn had been shocked the first day when Casey had followed him into the water without goggles. Casey had just shrugged it off, just like he did again now. "I've been swimming in the ocean for over fifteen years, you just get used to it, I guess."

  Shawn just shook his head. Casey flexed his leg muscles as he got ready to swim human-style again. Damn his legs were sore. After three days of having to kick with them instead of his tail, he was starting the feel the effects in muscles he wasn't used to using. He knew he wasn't as graceful swimming in his human form but that couldn't be helped.

  Casey followed Shawn's lazy strokes as they swam out a bit. He yanked on Shawn's leg as a sea turtle came into his view. When Shawn stopped swimming and looked back at him, Casey pointed at the turtle.

  He grinned when Shawn gasped in astonishment. They held still and the young turtle ventured closer. Casey recognized the turtle by the scar on his back as one that often hung around their shore.

  "That's awesome," Shawn whispered in awe as the turtle actually swam up to Casey before darting away. "It was like he knew you."

  Casey shrugged, hoping it looked casual. "I've been in these waters a lot, maybe he's just used to seeing me."

  Shawn tilted his head. "Yeah, right. You've probably named him and everything."

  Casey's face must have betrayed his guilt because Shawn grinned widely and splashed him with water. "I knew it! You did name him. What is it?"

  Casey brushed his dripping hair out of his face. "Crush."

  "Crush?" Shawn frowned. "Why Crush?"

  Casey called him Crush based on the sea turtle in 'Finding Nemo', but he wasn't sure he wanted Shawn to know that. It was one of his favorite movies as a little boy. He and Uncle Thomas would watch it together all the time until Casey thought he was 'too old for it' anymore. Fuck, now he was wishing that he could, just one more time... "Just... I don't know... it sounded cool," he said distantly, casting his gaze out over the waters before the memories could drown him.

  He started when he felt a soft touch on his cheek. He turned to find Shawn staring at him, his eyes shining with concern, as his fingers brushed his jaw.

  "Hey, you okay?" Shawn asked softly, and Casey couldn't help closing his eyes briefly as he leaned into the gentle touch.

  "Yeah," he finally said, trying to draw back.

  But Shawn's hand slipped down and cupped the back of his neck, drawing him in. "No, you're not. I can see it in your eyes."

  And Casey felt himself relaxing in the firm grip Shawn had on him, as if the man could ground his spiraling emotions with this simple touch.

  "My Uncle Thomas...we used to watch Finding Nemo when I was little," Casey finally admitted to the dark-haired man keeping him from falling apart again. "I named the turtle Crush after the turtle in the movie."

  Shawn pulled him closer until their foreheads touched. "And Crush
reminds you of your uncle sometimes," Shawn surmised. "The one who passed away."

  "Yeah." Casey took a shuddering breath as the firm touch and closeness of the other man brought him focus.

  Shawn's hand shook him slightly, drawing Casey's gray eyes to meet his. "It's okay to miss him. At least you still have your Uncle Martin to lean on."

  At that, Casey snapped free of his self-pity. "Yeah, yeah, of course," he muttered. As Shawn's hand slid free, Casey patted the man's firm bicep. "Come on, let's head up around the bend to your side and see if Dory is around."

  Shawn laughed and turned with Casey to head north. Just before he dove, though, Casey grabbed his arm, placing his hand firmly on Shawn's slick chest. Shawn frowned at him.

  Casey grinned and pointed into the waters in front of them. "We might want to wait for Mr. Ray to pass on by first."

  Shawn's eyes widened in shock as he jumped back at the sight of the dark three foot long creature floating by, grabbing onto Casey's shoulders. "Oh, shit!"

  Casey just started laughing as Shawn panicked at the sight of the rather small manta ray swimming lazily across the sandy bottom. "Jeez, Shawn, calm down, it's not like he's going to attack you or anything."

  "Really?" Shawn kept bouncing on his toes as if keeping as little of his body in contact with the ocean floor would protect him from a vicious attack by the small manta.

  "Yeah, he's basically just a baby," Casey chuckled as the graceful creature floated along filtering water for food.

  "A baby? Fuck, he's huge," Shawn gaped as he carefully kept an eye on the foraging fish. He hovered behind Casey, keeping a tight grip on his shoulders.

  Casey scoffed. That was not a huge manta ray by any means, if anything he was tiny in comparison to most which was why Casey suspected he was just a baby. When the ray swam around behind them, Casey felt Shawn almost climb up his back.

  "What the hell man?" Casey laughed, finding it amusing that the big strong man he'd come to... well, not love, really, not yet anyway... but at least like a lot was so scared of the large placid creature.